Who remembers that line from St. Elmo’s Fire? For all you young folks, this movie was out in 1980’s. I remember seeing it in high school with my friends. Of course, we all loved it. I it was one of the movies from the Brat Pack genre. And who didn’t love the Brat Pack?

As teenagers, we were all trying to find our way in life. You know, figure out what we’ll be doing when we grow up. Basically, what was the meaning of life for us. So often, we found ourselves asking one another, “Quick, what’s the meaning of life?” Sure, we were trying to be funny, but in reality, we were just a bunch of lost kids, trying to figure out where we fit in this world.

Now, years later, I find myself asking the same question. So many times, I wonder if I’ve done everything that I’m supposed to do. Did I make a difference? Did I leave my mark with anybody? Am I supposed to do more than what I’m doing? Am I just stuck in the” cycle of life” and not doing enough soul searching?

We’ve all been there. How many times have we asked ourselves if we are doing what we love. I mean, what if we made wrong choices? What if we had taken the other path when we reached the crossroads in our lives?

Ah, so many what ifs. I guess we can’t really worry about the what ifs. But I still think it’s important to do some real soul searching. It’s easy to just get caught up in all of our responsibilities; we go to work, pay our bills, get some sleep, wake up, and go to work again. Yep, that vicious cycle we loath so much. Don’t get me wrong. It’s imperative that we are responsible and make a living. Obviously, we have to pay our bills on time. Sorry, we can’t get away from that. And of course, if we keep our jobs, we can take care of our family and perhaps afford the nicer things in life.

Still, I can’t help but wonder if this is all there is. Is there more I should be doing? Sometimes I think that because of that vicious cycle, we forget to live. I mean really live. We forget to do things that make us happy. That’s what I mean by soul searching. We all have to find our own happiness.

I’m not whining at all about my life. I do believe I’ve accomplished quite a bit actually. I’m quite content, if not proud of many things. I’ve practiced physical therapy for over 20 years. And truly, I’ve learned so much from some pretty amazing patients.

I’ve been married for almost 20 years to this crazy but amazing guy. That’s pretty damn awesome!

Oh and did I mention that I have three beautiful children? They’re my everything.

And lastly, I’ve published three books. I mean to be able to say that I’m a published author is pretty cool, not to mention all of the awards and recognitions they have received.

And yet, I still find myself wondering… what’s the meaning of life?